Less is more in the early stages of dating...
This afternoon I met up with a friend of mine for coffee. She told me her frustrations about a guy she was seeing and it inspired me to write this article for you today.
The story went a little like this…
They’ve been hanging out / going on dates regularly for the past few months. He always avoids the “exclusive” chat. He’ll confuse her by inviting her to dinner with his parents, and then not text her for 3 days straight. He’ll be vague about his plans and often text her last minute to hang out.
He is the classic selfish fuckboy.
I’ve dealt with these kind of men many, many times. I can relate to my friend because I know that shitty feeling of being confused and frustrated from a man’s actions. I can tell she really likes the guy, and she’s a total catch! So what’s the deal? Where has she gone wrong? WTF is this guy’s issue?!
This is the deadly mix of a guy who doesn’t know exactly what he wants, and a girl who loves deeply and is wearing her heart on her sleeve.
Humans are weird. We want what we can’t have. There’s some scientific proof behind that statement, but let’s just stick to what my friend needs to do to get the guy to commit.
From my experience…
She needs to be less available. She needs to act more mysterious. She needs to make herself a priority and truly believe that she’ll be okay without him.
She basically needs to be more hard-to-get (in the right ways).
“BUT GAMES ARE BAD! I DON’T WANT TO PLAY GAMES!” I can hear you say it. I heard her say it today too when I gave her my opinion!
Sometimes games are necessary for some men. Not all men. But some men.
If he knows he can have you on a silver platter with the snap of his two fingers, he doesn’t feel the push to make things more serious. He doubts that you’re talking to other guys because you’ve made it clear to him that he’s what you want. That’s it.
If you’re in a similar situation where you just don’t know why he’s not committing more, try being more coy and he will desire you more. Trust me!
I did this with Ben when we first started seeing each other, and I truly think it’s what caught his attention in the beginning stages.
Still act like you, just be a less-needy version of you. Don’t say yes to every time he asks to see you. Rarely text first. Let him chase!